Coffee is for closers!!

Put that coffee down!! Coffees for closers only. Do you think I'm f-ing with you? I am not f-ing with you. I'm here from Patterson Corporate. And I'm here on a mission of mercy.

If you dont like it then leave, there's the door

We got at least 10 guys waiting to take your spot.

'Cause the good news is -- you're fired. The bad news is you've got, all you got, just one week to regain your jobs, starting today. Starting with today's calls. Oh, have I got your attention now? Good. 'Cause we're adding a little something to this quaters sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Golf Trip. Anyone want to see second prize? Second prize's a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired. You get the picture? You laughing now? You got leads. Patterson paid good money. Get their agreement to sell them! You can't close the leads you're given, you can't close shyt, you ARE shyt! Hit the bricks pal and beat it 'cause you are going out!!!

What's my name? F- YOU, that's my name!! You know why, Mister? 'Cause you drove a Prius to get here tonight, I drove an eighty thousand dollar BMW. That's my name!! And your name is "you're wanting." And you can't play in a man's game. You can't close them. Then go home and tell your wife your troubles. Because only one thing counts in this life! Get them to sign on the line which is dotted! You hear me,you fking maggots?

: A-B-C. A-always, B-be, C-closing. Always be closing! Always be closing!! A-I-D-A. Attention, interest, decision, action. Attention -- do I have your attention? Interest -- are you interested? I know you are because it's F or walk. You close or you hit the bricks! Decision -- have you made your decision for Christ?!! And action. A-I-D-A; get out there!! You got the prospects comin' in; you think they came in to get out of the rain? Guy doesn't walk on the lot unless he wants to buy. Sitting out there waiting to give you their money! Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it?

I made $200,000 last year. How much you make? You see, pal, that's who I am. And you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shyt. Good father? F you --go home and play with your kids!! You wanna work here? Close!! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you c-sucker? You can't take this -- how can you take the abuse you get a docs office?! You don't like it -- leave. I can go out there today with the materials you got, and make $10,000 today. Today! In eight hours! Can you? Can you? Go and do likewise! A-I-D-A!! Get mad! You sons of bitches! Get mad!! You know what it takes to sell dental equipment & supplies? It takes brass balls.

Go and do likewise, gents. The money is out there, you pick it up,it's yours. You don't--I have no sympathy for you. You wanna go out on those calls today and close, close, it's yours. If not, you're going to be shining my shoes. Bunch of losers sitting around in a bar. "Oh yeah,I used to be a dental rep, it's a tough racket."

We got new new leads. These are the OmniCam leads. And to you, they're gold. And you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you is just throwing them away. They're for closers. I'd wish you good luck but you wouldn't know what to do with it if you got it. And to answer your question, why am I here? I came here because Guggenheim & Misiak asked me to, they asked me for a favor. I said, the real favor, follow my advice and fire your fking ass because a loser is a loser.

 

Thank you for your valuable contribution to the discussion.

Take your medicine immediately

 

What a wanker you are.

The OP is obviously spoofing GlenGary and did a pretty good job.

Nice work OP!

 

In my experience, the situation was very toxic. Please be cautious.

 

Which situation? Be cautious of?

 

Read the board my friend. Several posters are willingly sharing 'life after patterson' stories. You've been warned.

 

Warned of? You talk in riddles, just say what you mean.

 

I respectfully wish you the best.

 

You don't know

 

That was awesome! Anyone who took that to be serious is already in the wrong line of work

 

But our branch manager did talk to us like this

 

I laughed so hard at this. Thank you OP! Well done.

 

Fantastic