BITETTI THWARTS SANOFI TAKEOVER!

Discussion in 'Bristol-Myers Squibb' started by CapPig, May 30, 2008 at 8:41 AM.

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  1. CapPig

    CapPig Guest

    VP of Bristol Myers Squibb Upsets Sanofi Execs
    Dateline Plainsboro 12:15 GMT
    -Associated Reps-

    VP Teresa Bitetti successfully thwarted a takeover attempt by rival pharmaceutical giant Sanofi-Aventis. The maladroit Wellseley grad puzzled and scared the SA executives as they toured the Plainsboro facility by having everyone in the neuroscience division stick their heads in the sand. As the SA execs came around the corner they were shocked at what they perceived to be asses growing out of the floor.

    Senior VP of development for SA, Fabrich Monsault La Pierre La Frenchie-douche was quoted as saying this, "Mon dieu! We came around zee corner and zer were asses everywhere. I asked Monsieur Hooper what zis was and ee told us zis was the zee NS division who has tried a new approach wis zer sales. Ee said said rather zan listen to reason, zay have decided to stick zer heads in zee sand."

    This new approach has drawn much criticism from the sales force. Scathing criticism has reached new levels in the country's midsection. NS STBM Linda Lotsaluv from Lousiville, KY reported this. "Ever since this ridiculous, inept, unqualified excuse for a leader ascended to the position, the morale has rapidly declined to the point that reps are starting to eat their own hands."

    Huerta Hernandez from Huntington Beach, CA was quoted saying, "I'm not surprised. This woman has been showing her ass ever since that nightmare sales meeting in Orlando. I mean, it's one thing to looks ridiculous in those outfits from the Dune movie, but to actually be that poor of a leader is another thing. I was so frustrated yesterday, I went home and burned ants with a magnifying glass for over an hour"

    Associated Press tried to reach VP Mark Pavao for a comment regarding the unbelievably demoralizing lack of leadership by Bitetti, but he to had his head stuck in the sand and his ass had no comment.

    While this drama continues to play out, reps are anxious to know when the leadership of the NS division will pull their heads out of the sand and realize that the division is sliding into a very deep abyss of unreachable call goals, IC plans that Stephen Hawking couldn't figure out, and that annoying greeting, "Hi Folks. It's Teresa." Until then BMS looks continue it's practice of see no evil, hear no evil and let the sales force be miserable.
     

  2. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    Here we go. Everyone starts pointing the finger at management and marketing looking for someone to blame. Look in the mirror. Get out there and SELL. Oh that's right, you would have to go to work. Look, there is no reason to use Abilify over Generic Risperdal. None. Next year. Seroq goes. You guys are in the same boat as PC. You better get ready. Oh, don't count on the anti-depressant. It's no better than generic Paxil, or any of the others. Just will cost a lot more.
     
  3. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest


    You know dingleberry I did work. I worked my ass off. My budget is spent, I averaged 9.5 calls a day, my MS change according to all the monthly scorecards was always in the top 10 percent of my group and now the IC scorecards come out and I'm in the bottom 10 percent, with a MS that has no close resemblance to all the data I've been given throughout the quarter.

    With that being said, people who scored lower than me throughout the quarter are now ranked higher. Seeing as I can't poop in a doctor's office without having cleared by legal. And seeing as I have absolutely no control over where this worthless pigshit group of sales ops turds pulls there numbers, I think we have every right to complain about management.

    Don't get me started on Abilify over Risperdal. Just go peddle your wares to the PC docs and stay off our threads.
     
  4. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    This is Fuckin Hilarious! Thank you for making my night! LOL (an Ex Immunoscience Rep)
     
  5. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    You should know, you wrote it. Good job giving yourself a pat on the back. You must be so proud of yourself.
     
  6. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    Enjoy the three years you have left. They will be here before you know it. I would try and jump to Oncology.
     
  7. #7 CapPig, May 31, 2008 at 5:17 PM
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 10, 2008 at 9:12 PM
    CapPig

    CapPig Guest

    Au contaire. I do not reply to my own posts. To the original person who made the compliment: I thank you.

    To the above poster: You really need a reality check. I will agree that we get paid a great salary and the job is easy at times. However, we get beat up every day. We deal with legal, samples scares, mean nurses, other reps, call averages, etc. I personally do not live off of my bonus. But, when you look forward to a certain amount of money coming in at bonus time, due to the data you have received throughout the quarter, and the results are not even close to your original perception, it makes one wonder where the numbers came from.

    Many people have to forego vacations and other things. Pavao, Bitetti, my RBH, and MY DBM are all to blame. Pavao and Bitetti for being grossly poor managers and my dbm and rbh for not standing up for the reps.

    And if anyone replies with some relativism pointing out how other people in the world have it bad, save it.
     
  8. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    Don't have to reply about how bad some people have it. You're going to one of them in about 3 years. Probably before then. BMS always starts layoffs early. Enjoy.
     
  9. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    You are a genius-NOT!!! I just said I worked for Immunoscience, NOT NEUROSCIENCE dingbat. You are a screaming example of the imcompetence in this company. I have no idea who Bitetti is, I just saw the headline and read it last night. As I wrote, the comments were very funny, and I gave credit where credit was due. Now go count your samples, as someone as dumb as you better check on the totals you have. Surely you have a yearly audit coming soon?
     
  10. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    morale will sink even lower when the messages go out that as a nation, we are well above plan with Abilify, even though half of the sales force will be below 100% of SGA thanks to this win/lose force rank IC plan..."we should only be rewarding the top performers"...what happens when most people perform...mutiny!
     
  11. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest


    It's not even funny. At least if your going for humor, BE FUNNY. It was a good idea though.
     
  12. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    Hey genius. Let's try again. I'll type slower. e n j o y t h e 3 y e a r s l e f t. This company will be gone. Immuno as well. The competition is laughing at you and BMS. BTW, how's everything going in Deven?
     
  13. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    I'll do the same. If you remember from my original posting, I said I was an EX IMMUNOSCIENCE REP!! THAT MEANS I DON"T WORK FOR BMS ANY MORE!!! i occasionally check the web to see how dysfunctional Immuno still is, and so, I really don't give a shit about your 3 year threat. I have a new job in a forward thinking company. Life is actually GOOD again. However, you my friend still work for that shithole. Best of luck to you...better save some of your abilify samples for your own sanity!
     
  14. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest


    We've had this conversation before. I'll type even slower this time, and maybe you will get it. I d o n ' t b e l i e v e y o u. One more time. How's everything in Immuno? Are you going to have our paper clip bill covered this quarter? Office Max needs to know.
     
  15. CapPig

    CapPig Guest

    As much I appreciate a good argument, can we get back to the my original point which is that the leadership is inept and worthless and people are getting screwed on the IC?

    To the ex-immunoscience rep: Good on you for getting out. I will be out within a year all things going well. Not just BMS, but the whole industry. It has become a golden handcuff I have to break.
     
  16. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    Sorry, no one cares about your post. Come back when you get funny.
     
  17. CapPig

    CapPig Guest

    \

    This is little tete a tete reminds me of a movie.


    Annoying Kool Aid rep: I understand you're pretty funny as a poster and, well, comedy is kind of a hobby of mine. Well, actually, it's a little more than just a hobby, Reader's Digest is considering publishing two of my jokes.

    CapPig: Really.

    Annoying Kool Aid rep: Yeah. And perhaps some night we could maybe get together and swap humorous stories, for fun.

    CapPig: Oh, why not? Maybe play a couple of Tennessee Ernie Ford records, that'd be a hoot.

    Annoying Kool Aid rep: That's a joke, right?

    CapPig: Maybe.

    Annoying Kool Aid rep: I get it.


    This is probably not funny to you either is it?
     
  18. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    waiting......waiting......waiting.

    Where's the punch line? Again, you need to work on your delivery or get another writer.
     
  19. CapPig

    CapPig Guest

    We should start addressing you as "Mother". You are on every thread on this board lecturing people about how good they have it.

    The script I wrote to you is from a really good movie called Good Morning Vietnam. It stars Robin Williams. I don't suppose that someone with your comedic experience is familiar with that movie so I'll just send along my pity at your uptight sphincter and move on.
     
  20. Anonymous

    Anonymous Guest

    It's just not funny. Sorry.