You're Welcome!

Dear Cornerstone,

You are welcome for stocking the pharmacies with your products. You are welcome for trusting in this company and burning up our savings. You are welcome for looking up coverage for you, since nobody in home office knows anything about managed care. You are welcome for us working for under minimum wage. You are welcome for putting all those miles on our cars.

Thank you for that voicemail from Escrow. It was VERY nice. Considering it was his first voicemail/contact with the entire salesforce, it was nice of him to NOT introduce himself or state his title. Straight and to the point: "This is Escrow ... lots will be fired so we can make it through 2008. I make a nice 6-figure salary. Thank you for listening to this voicemail. Be by your cell phone tomorrow because I don't want to have to fucking call you twice to fire your ass. Escrow out!"

Oh by the way ... we wanted to thank you for the one thing you did for us.... lay us off.

Sincerely,
1/3 of the sales force

PS...good luck getting your samples back until you pay me for the last 2 months.