Please help me

Anonymous · Jan 10, 2013 at 7:28 AM

Anonymous said: ↑

If you call the day before Subway will make you one of those 6-foot long subs. Be careful driving it to the office though. My Fusion is so small I had about 18" of sammich hanging out of the rear windows on each side. Then it started raining. Then I sideswiped a Hell's Angel with a soggy giant sub, after which he crashed his scooter. Then I had like 50 Hell's Angels chase me all the way to the parking garage at the hospital, and I put it in reverse right after I entered, causing them to all back up and pop their tires on the spikes next to the DO NOT BACK UP - SEVERE TIRE DAMAGE sign. So I was able to do my lunch. It was great. On my way out I just rammed the Fusion off a 2nd-story ramp and through a short concrete wall, landing safely outside the garage, and the Hell's Angels never caught me!

So I'd say Subway. But make sure you call at least a day in advance.
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Greatest. Post. Ever.

I don't know who you are, but you are a true genius. I am a hot chick, and if you are a guy, I would gladly blow you whilst making "yummy" noises... Where/when can we meet? I work Tuesdays & Thursdays from 10-2, so I have plenty of free time for a storage unit rendezvous...

Anonymous · Jan 11, 2013 at 6:27 PM

Well... maybe it is too late, but for the next time you can try cooking something like a stew or roast beef and take it to the lunch.
They will appreciate it.

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