MSG from the EXEC: Don't panic - we are making more snake oil

Big chief "JJ Sitting Bear" issued and important statement today following the unanimous FDA rejection of a heart failure drug that was supposed to transform the company's fortunes.

JJ Sitting Bear said, "we got caught this time, but next time we will catch them napping, we just didn't have enough slides to send them to sleep" .. he also added that "from his previous experience - when then chips are down, you just make more snake oil, its just like cooking up some ketchup"

"DE Running Wolf" - was quick to add "We are Novartians" we don't take "NO" lying down from ANYONE, especially government agencies; we will litigate against the FDA until they say yes; our primary secondary endpoint were a clear third factor in why the US should pay us hundreds of millions of dollars a year because this drug may have some benefit; and we employ millions of people in the US.

Novartis PR closed the call by saying "its a great day and a great result for the Novartis company". "Very few global pharma Co's have ever got zero votes - it makes us pretty unique as a global healthcare organisation and our employees can go to be tonight in total knowledge that they face zero job security".

HR were unavailable for comment as they were working with UPS to create some labels.

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