Polyamory didn't work for me :-(

Discussion in 'MCR American Pharmaceuticals' started by anonymous, Dec 20, 2015 at 8:44 AM.

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Did polyamory save or ruin your love life?

Poll closed Dec 19, 2016.
  1. Indifferent

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  2. Ruined it

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  3. Saved it

    0 vote(s)
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  4. What exactly is polyamory?

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  1. anonymous

    anonymous Guest

    What I have been through and what my family has been through have been some of the hardest and most painful things I can think of. I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy. I have learned that when you add people you add conflicts. I have learned that I did not know myself or my relationship as well as I thought. Love is a very dangerous and wonderful thing. Being in love is the best and worst drug imaginable, being loved can be the biggest thrill and cause the most pain. Feeling that you are losing love can have near deadly effects.

    These are a few thoughts from my broken heart and scattered mind. If you think that you or your spouse are falling in love with someone else, think hard about who your established partner is, what they were like before they fell in love with another person. Watch what happens to the established relationships, don't just see what you want to see, see all of it. If your established partner shows concern, worry, or even jealousy; stop and look closely at the entire relationship. Find out what is really wrong, don't assume that it is "just their problem".

    My first attempt at polyamory was a disaster. Like many people I didn't even know what polyamory was until I thought it was happening to me. I know what polyamory is now though, and what it is not. It will be a long time challenge for me to trust anyone else again, let alone have a poly relationship.

    My life has been changed. Anyone in a poly relationship will agree, lives change in a multiple relationship. When they fail they hurt every bit as much as a monogamous relationship, there is just more fallout from them. Not every relationship will be bad, many will struggle at some point, some of those will even get past it. It is not for me to tell anyone if they should try this or not. I think the only way you learn in life is by trying new things. I tried something new. For a few glorious months it was fantastic. No, I will never be the same person I was a year ago, but I think that now I'm okay with that. If I can help prevent someone else from experiencing what I did, that's even better.