Why does every team at Amgen have a cheesy name?

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anonymous

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Is it mandatory or just a holdover from the Merckette Manual?

Some of my favorites to date:

Pacific Patient Servers
New England Tour d' Force
Mid Atlantic Derm Dominators
East Elite
Portland Pride
Albany Allies
Southern Swarm


Really, what's behind this culture of giving fake names to every imaginable team? I got put on a new "sprint" last week and the first thing the facilitator did was give some time to coming up with a team name! We will be done in 4 weeks, but first agenda item next week is our team name? Why, why, why?

So indicative of our activity culture. Wish we were a performance culture, but I am going to suggest that we are the cross-functional global champs.
 








anonymous said:
Happy to report that my team does not have a name. My manager said we never will. That’s why he’s the best
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A rarity at Amgen. Policy 202.16.298 clearly states that any group of more than 3 people must have a team name.

still available are:

the Demigods
the most miraculous
the Hoss Ballers
the righteous collaborators

Now get with the program
 


Why are we the "Dynasty?"

All our best have been run off or left for better jobs?

Better we change our name to Derm Execution Report Fakers

Susan, Ian, Fat Bastard: You try to figure it out.
 


anonymous said:
Is it mandatory or just a holdover from the Merckette Manual?

Some of my favorites to date:

Pacific Patient Servers
New England Tour d' Force
Mid Atlantic Derm Dominators
East Elite
Portland Pride
Albany Allies
Southern Swarm


Really, what's behind this culture of giving fake names to every imaginable team? I got put on a new "sprint" last week and the first thing the facilitator did was give some time to coming up with a team name! We will be done in 4 weeks, but first agenda item next week is our team name? Why, why, why?

So indicative of our activity culture. Wish we were a performance culture, but I am going to suggest that we are the cross-functional global champs.
Click to expand...
A lot of public school in this post
 








We ignore our team name.

On our district only text chain, we refer to ourselves as the,

"BWE Lovers"

This silly thing called Best Week Every is just a smoke and mirrors so "She" can sell upwards.

Shouldn't every week be patient focused, making calls, and not worried about 3 weekly TEAMs calls and special ERG Rallies?

The best part of BWE is that we get to pretend we are Celgene again for 5 days.
 


BWE used to make me chuckle. No conference calls, no ride days, reduced admin, high spend, high activity.

Crazy to think that the best week ever was a typical celgene week that was expected.

I guess this week it can be called “the most mediocre, distracting week ever”.
 


anonymous said:
BWE used to make me chuckle. No conference calls, no ride days, reduced admin, high spend, high activity.

Crazy to think that the best week ever was a typical celgene week that was expected.

I guess this week it can be called “the most mediocre, distracting week ever”.
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The Amgen way is ACTIVITY for the sake of measuring the parts that sell a good story in the home office. That's it.

Took me a while to learn, but I am now fully baked. My recipie:

1. I spend at least 4 weeks pre-BWE communicating my intentions across my cross-business unit, collaborative network.

2. I spend BWE just making sure all my food deliveries are on track and gathering sign in sheets from office managers.

3. I spend the next 4 weeks post-BWE sending out success stories about me in BWE to my cross functional network.


Pro-tip: on the 3 weekly calls we have, and especially Town Halls and Regional/National calls, pay close attention to buzzwords and work those into your post-BWE success stories. This will only enhance your glow. For example, you might share a success story about how you alone gave "air cover" to a group of MAs and how several questions came up from patients during BWE where the MA was able to save the Otezla NBRX solely due to your actions. Thank me later.

BWE is actually a 9 week event.

Compete Intensely and WIN!!!!!!!
 


The very fact that we have a week dedicated to how we did every week at Celgene shows the injustice in this world. Amgen was a very wealthy company not afraid to use debt and they simply purchased their way back into dermatology, a place they had been run out of by the very people they now abuse. I remember those days. My DM would just say go get all the Enbrel business. It's easy to take anywhere you want. Like stealing from a baby. Now, all I care about is Summer Shut Down. Only 10 weeks to Shut Down and the best part is that the "leadership" types take the week before and week after off, so it's like I get a BWE on both sides of the shutdown. 3 weeks of bliss not having to listen to corporate jargon.
 


new one came across my desk yesterday - the Avengers!

Does anyone even know what avenge means? Or just got the name because of the movies?

Typical Amgen silliness. Giggle. Giggle.
 



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